Sadie decided during her third week here that she will extend her stay. Now she's going to be here for another three weeks to the limit that she can stay (she has to go back to be at someone's wedding). Most importantly, she booked her stay for the next three weeks at a single airbnb, so no more moving around like in the first three weeks in what were essentially hostels or hotels.

From my point of view, it's been wonderful that she's here. Even if she wishes that I wanted something from life and wanted to live, I've drawn certain lines in the sand that if she were to cross wouldn't make any difference. What and who I am now is deeply ingrained and her hopes otherwise are unlikely to change them.

So we enjoy each others' company and intimacies and share just about everything, including every embarrassing thing from our pasts.

She moved to the airbnb today and I have a set of keys to the apartment, and I don't know why I'm not there now. She decided to stay another three weeks, and I should be taking advantage of and relishing each extra day that she's decided to be here. I'm slow like that.

Maybe just this first day, I wanted her to establish the apartment as her space. And perhaps insomnia being a fear and an issue, as I haven't been able to get much sleep anywhere but my own apartment. Although that hasn't stopped insomnia being an issue at home, either. Generally it's been good, but when it hits, it wipes me out and is a chronic fear.