Negativity: part I
Through all the negativity of mine that I've been harping about for the past year or more, I think I've actually been positive about it. Really, the worse thing would be to be caught up in the negativity without any self-awareness about it – to just react to external stimuli and become a negative being for however long it lasts.

That's what negativity is – a being. It's like a flash with all of the molecules in my body, maybe just the energy related ones, polarizing and I become the negativity itself. The negativity is here, it's a latent part of my being. I'm not trying to get rid of it anymore. I look at it as a possible karmic result; past actions manifesting.

The theory would be that previously I acted negatively and that became part of my being, part of the habit of my being. It's here now because I cultivated it before in a deep and intense way, without any self-awareness or self-reflection. Actions now become seeds for later. Seeds before manifest as action now, given the right circumstances and conditions. Actions now used to be actions before.

In this lifetime, other karma, as well as causes and conditions, have allowed me to be self-aware of the negativity. It's here, but I'm aware that I don't like it, I don't like the way it makes me act, I don't like the way it makes me think, I don't like the way it makes me feel, and I can change it. It doesn't have to be this way. I have the tools to counter it.

The action now is to cultivate countering it, and step by step, it's removed completely. Even in a near-future lifetime, the negativity may continue to exist depending on how deeply it was cultivated before, but by cultivating countering it, the hope is that will be more natural and habitual to counter it, or for the positive to exist and grow and be cultivated.