Now I'm ready for the next season, which Cinemax usually starts airing after they blitz through the previous season. Yay! I hope it doesn't interfere with Sopranos on HBO.
But they finished the season, having aired 4 episodes per day for the past week, and now I have to try to find a new schedule. The past few days, I took a sleeping pill during the last episode, and that usually tided me over all the way through most of work the next day, with crashing typically in the last hour, when the pressure turns on to get the newspaper's final pages out.
The insomnia has seriously disrupted a lot of things. Fortunately, the band hasn't really been disrupted because the bass player bought a restaurant which will eventually become our regular weekend gigs once it opens, but until then we haven't been rehearsing because he's been busy doing that. Still gigging, though, and so far gigs have been alright. Maybe the insomnia has been helping the gigging!
Running and riding went out, although I did try running a few times, once achieving a 4-mile run at an average of 8:24 miles. Even now I look at that number and go, "Wow, that's slow". Usually I can't run that slow if I tried.
Yesterday I found a layer of dust on my bike. Optimistic that the insomnia will be gone soon, and not having work or rehearsal today, I didn't take a sleeping pill yesterday morning and slept decently, I think. I think I slept at least five hours before waking up for the first time. That's really good. Usually I haven't been able to sleep more than three hours, and the first time waking up was also the last time.
But then I took my bike out to see where things were, and after just a few miles I realized it was a very bad idea, and headed back. I suspect even after I can sleep again, it will take a while for my body to recover.
Then at night, I don't know what came over me, but I decided to go for a 6 mile run, 6 being the longest distance I've gotten to this season. I was determined to do it even at 8+ miles. Part of the optimism, I suppose, that the insomnia will be gone soon. I also didn't drink coffee today for the first time since I can't even recall. I wouldn't be surprised if since the monastery when I decided to kick the caffeine addiction. After I had re-addicted one of the monks, haha!
I did the six mile run at 7:34 miles and was upset. Upset that I didn't mark 7:30 miles. That's pretty twisted, but I do think I was a little delerious at that point. I was talking to myself and directing myself to get to the nearest 7-11 to rehydrate. This wasn't supposed to be a push run, just a do-what-I-can run, but it started going well enough that I did start pushing.
I made my way to the nearest 7-11 and then started home through the Raohe night market which was almost closed down. I downed 800ml. of sports drink, sucked down a vitamin gel packet (Asia's answer to energy bars), and then after I downed a bottle of orange juice, I couldn't take another step. I stopped. I felt my chest tightening up and thought, "hm, not good".
I felt a huge pressure envelop my body and I found myself clutching my chest, which made me think, "heart attack?" (it is the classic gesture in movies, after all). Then I forced myself to relax and breathe, stop, loose the pressure. As calmly as I could I continued through the night market to the entrance where I knew there were benches, and there I sat down.
I don't know what that was. I guess I don't really care. I did prepare myself that if I was going to collapse, I would collapse where there were people around, and at 1:30 a.m., there were still people around a closing night market.
This incident probably had something to do with the lack of rest my body has gotten. If I have a heart problem, I wouldn't be surprised, considering how much abuse my heart has absorbed. An alcohol related problem I expect, but find no evidence of. I even wonder if running and riding has actually stymied my efforts at self-destruction. Cardiovascular work-outs, pretty good oxygenation. God, that would suck. But it's not like I would have given up running or riding.
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| SATURDAY, JUNE 21 - Amy, Andy & Alex @ Le Mer. Another gig there, another hanging out on the north coast in the late afternoon. |
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| 7:51 p.m. - Between sets. The other band members are more socially connected than me and have peeps willing to travel all this way for our gigs. |
