I guess this is safely what may be called a "lull" in my life. Nothing going on. Nothing planned. Turning around and shining a flashlight of skepticism on the past eight months to scrounge out what was real and what was clutching at straws.

Everything I believe in is real, as it should be. To the extent that what I believe in had to be couched in religious terminology is merely unfortunate. Religion is just so problematic when it comes to human application.

I used to bridle at the disparagement that Buddhism is not a religion, but a philosophy. It was mostly Christians asserting the superiority of their hegemony. But all things equal, I'm fine with Buddhism as a philosophy, and I'd sooner take offense at it being called a "religion".

I'm all for "Westerners" taking Buddhism as a philosophy and applying the principles that make sense to them to the religious tradition in which they were raised. That's better than pretending to be "Buddhist" and falling for all the exotic trappings of Asian cultures because it's new and different from their own traditions.

The concept of religion is so emotionally charged and imbued with competitiveness, judgment, heirarchy. Holier than thou. Righteousness, implying someone else's wrongeousness. We're going to heaven, you're gonna burn in hell. Now with philosophy, it's all good to proclaim and debate one's philosophy being better than someone else's. At the end of the day, we're all just human.

Philosophy is about how we live our lives each day. My philosophy regarding riding my bike is: "Don't get hit!". When I head out on my bike, that's not an abstract concept in the back of my mind like a religion. It's practical reality regarding how I ride and negotiate traffic. And believe me, from what I've seen, it's obviously not everyone's philosophy.

I'm perfectly comfortable saying that I don't have a religion. My philosophy inspired by Buddhism fits perfectly well on a practical level. Even the mystical and metaphysical parts for me, because for "me", not just as this simple individual entity typing this, those are practical.

It's not an easy philosophy. It requires transformation. Being able to transform. Transform my life, my being, my environment, my reality, by tapping into something more than just the physical manifestation that we call reality.

It might even mean suicide; it means breaking through the barriers of our normative lives and perceptions. If I think suicide is what most people seem to think it is, then it's wrong. But if it is what I think it is, then it's transformation, in conception and execution. This is just an example.

But Buddhism does require a transformation. It requires a radical way of looking at the world where the interest of the self does not prevail over the interests of everyone else. Where we treat everyone we meet as members of our own family, and we treat the members of our own family very, very well. With love, understanding, compassion, and equanimity. Screw all the imagery and religious sounding mumbo jumbo and nirvana and enlightenment. And you don't have to be Buddhist to implement that transformation.

Northern Exposure Quote of the Day:
One Who Waits: Do you recognize this place?
Ed: Uh, I don't think so.
One Who Waits: This is where you were welcomed into the tribe. There is an old saying that if you come back to the place where you became a man, you will remember all of those things you need to be happy.
Ed: I, I don't remember anything.
One Who Waits: That saying never did make sense to me, but I thought it was worth a try.