I'm still working on disciplining my practice. This is not a vacation. This is to see if I want to be a monk for the rest of my life. I don't think I have a problem with that concept. I don't have a problem with wanting to be a monk. I think the issue is "rest of my life". Anything for the rest of my life is not something I want made final. 

But that's a separate issue from disciplining my practice. This monastic tradition is pretty low-key and relaxed, emphasizing compassion and connection over strict contemplation and self-realization. Strict contemplation is manifested in mindful living, and self-realization is a larger transformation that comes out of the overall practice of compassion and engagement. 

I'm not saying I get the practice yet, I'm sure I don't, but I do know that I need to discipline my focus, remaining mindful in social interactions and being strict about what I'm doing when. Hmm, that said, right now, in this moment, I need to get off the computer and get to bed. Tomorrow another week starts.