I'm so sick of the negativity. I'm so sick of the anger, the hatred, the aggression. It comes up and I try to shut it down as fast as possible. I don't want to be this way, I don't want to feel these things. Shut it down, shut it down now, and only behind my eyes hears this.

I also don't want to be a pussy in this country of cultural idiocy, so if I can let out a little expression, a little steam, that what people are doing makes no sense and is indicative of idiocy, I will.

I just want to be me, and when I can, I will.

But basically I just want to shut me down. I'm not impressed by what I've become. And looking at myself as a reflection of people in my life, I'm so not impressed.