I woke up out of a dream where my luggage was being checked on the Japan side. The officer wasn't really doing anything. I moved a pair of shoes from one part of my luggage to another. Next I was in a car driving away from the counter. I wasn't driving. I looked at my luggage, which was a random assortment of shit lying in the back, and wondered whether I couldn't travel more compact. Then I realized I probably shouldn't be driving away from the counter, I should've been heading towards the gates.

I had slept an incredible 11 hours. I woke up feeling incredibly empty. Maybe it's the weather, maybe it's the season, maybe it's not having been in a relationship in four years, maybe it's post-visiting-great-friend depression, maybe it's post-sickie depression . . . empty.

I remembered that I have to go to a birthday party tonight and didn't want to. Empty.

I stumbled outside my front door and soaked in the afternoon sunlight for a few seconds and stumbled back into my kitchen to make coffee. Empty.

And then I paused and thought, "STOP!!". And I did. And I didn't feel empty anymore. It's that easy and it isn't. Story of my life.

current soundtrack: Smashing Pumpkins - "Siamese Dream"