Right alright, mystically speaking, I process my family as part of some spiritual challenge I've set for myself that was in line with my karma. How I was born into a family so removed from anything resembling Dharma is beyond me, and that I've discovered it as my resonant belief system is nothing short of a miracle.

Therefore.

I should not be positing my family in opposition to myself, that there can be a winner or loser, but as a personal challenge to find common ground in our differing value systems, whereby the "truths" that I'm utilizing don't contradict or offend the truths of their values and belief systems. This is to show to myself that I really have learned something about "truths" that are really applicable.

Who the fuck do I think I'm kidding?

I need to work with a "truth" that I call Dharma, and mesh it with values and beliefs that don't resemble Dharma, that reject "Dharma", and do it in a way that doesn't look like I'm working with Dharma at all (principle of non-prosyletizing, not exposing Dharma to those who aren't ready for or open to it).

And I'm doing this for the sole reason that these people are blood relatives. They are not my spiritual family, I did not inherit their spiritual genes, I am in no way a "continuation" of them. Their ancestors are not my ancestors. My descendents are not their descendents.

I'd rather shove my head up a constipated donkey's ass.

I think suicide would be the best way to get through to these people. A close unexpected death is the only thing I can think of that might shock them into realizing the impermanence of life in a visceral way. It's wishful thinking.

It's even more wishful thinking that they might then realize the impermanence of their lives and to focus on doing something meaningful, within their own value systems, not mine, with their lives. Not likely, suicides almost never impact people in a positive, constructive way. But hey, don't blame the suicides for that.

Mind you, this isn't a reason for me to commit suicide, it's not a justification. It's just looking at the bright side, optimist that I am, of something I've independently decided to do (not saying I'll succeed in doing it).