Final report is done, no big deal. Winter weather gloom and seasonal affective distortions seem to have set in and I'm battling it with chocolate. Dove dark.

Tomorrow I have an audition, which is tolerable. It's the most set up and formal affair of the music contacts I'm being bombarded with. Several weeks ago, in a flurry of trying to be more social (what was I thinking?), I contacted a bunch of people about doing music, and now it's all coming back to me when I'm in the leastest mood to deal with it.

But I'm trying to tell myself to slap out of it, I started it, go through with it. Respond to these people, make the connection, knowing that even if it came to anything, I just wouldn't care.

Negativity still creeping back in. It's been reaching a fevered pitch and I'm trying to beat it back down with these posts.

I need to send emails to people who helped me with the final report, thanking them. It's basically my cousin, my aunt (who I need to contact to tell her I'm coming to Kaohsiung on Sunday if I decide to do that), and a woman I met last week through a meditation group and with whom I did a language exchange. One day retreat on Saturday I still haven't decided on, but would be a good idea if I want to maintain this contact. She's one of the contact people for the group. Push to be positive, don't sink.