I can't tell you how well that "Don't be an asshole" mantra has been working. And with some twists!

Somewhere in my twisted logic, I'd thunk that the beneficiary of me telling myself not to be an asshole would be other people. They don't get my bad vibes or nasty looks or worse. Truth is nary a soul could care less what I'm thinking or how I'm behaving.

But it turns out the primary beneficiary of "Don't be an asshole" is me! It just feels like I'm being kinder to myself when I stop myself thinking that way. It helps me be nicer, and in turn, calmer. Variations have cropped up including "Don't think like an asshole" and "Don't look like an asshole". What a great use for the word "asshole".

It's even helpful when the other person is "in the wrong". I don't know if anyone else thinks this way, it may be a throwback from law school where somebody is always at fault, and it's never yourself. But sometimes they really are being rude or clueless or whatever and it makes me critical if not angry, and then "Don't be an asshole" shuts it down nicely.

And it should be shut down. I don't want to care if people are rude or clueless or whatever. People do what they do. I've gotten to the point that if I were to see myself I'd probably think I was rude and clueless and whatever. So it's better this way.

Great. Once again my great personal endeavor only puts me in the range of what is considered "standard". Story of my life.

Like studying this stupid language. If I was putting this much effort into studying physics or marketing or law, in the end I'd have some insight or expertise into the subject. But studying a language, you never become an expert, you never have insight. You're surrounded by a whole country of people who speak it naturally as breathing, and will always be more natural at it than you.

I really think I'm getting somewhere.