OK, I can't do another today, either. I get tense around people. I feel my blood thickening, stiffening, coagulating. Is there any point left in maintaining social relationships? After they leave, I need to decompress. Alcohol doesn't help, we'd been drinking. I don't like drinking socially. It just made things worse. I downed three glasses of orange juice.

Now I'm really freezing. Don't touch anything, leave everything just as they left it. Eventually I'll get around to putting things where they belong. I don't need any more stuff in my apartment. But alas, more stuff. Whatever. I don't care. It's just one more thing someone will have to deal with.