Relationships, I guess, have been on my mind. The issue has intruded into my dreams lately. Last night, the part that I remember was set in my room in my parents house, and I was lying in bed with someone I had a crush on, but we had an understanding that we were just friends. I think the imprint of the person in the dream was Katie, who I used to have a crush on. We were there just as friends. She tossed the book that was lying on the bed off. She curled up to sleep, I just loved her.

Then there was another dream, and the imprint was my cousin Audrey. My cousin and I have a history of a very strange mystical love between us that goes back almost 20 years. I don't remember the dream, I just know that she had something to do with it.

It's human to want to be in a relationship. It's human to crave intimacy. I don't want anything to do with it, but I'm still human. But no, no, no, I will not even consider the possibility of getting into a relationship this late in the game. Even when I meet someone who catches my eye and makes good eye contact, no, no, no. It's too late. I'll just have to suffer through any unconscious suggestion or obsession that relationships are desirable.