I still have some top shelf stuff that I'll sip through (you don't shoot the good stuff), and a bunch of liqueurs and a single bottle of wine. People rarely notice any difference between me drunk and not drunk. The key indicator has been smell, and not behavior.
And quite honestly, I haven't noticed much difference either, except that I spend a lot of time reading these days, and I can't concentrate on reading when I'm drinking. Before long, no one will even know how much I used to drink. Fortunately, I've never thought of being "alcoholic" as part of my identity, so no loss there if nobody acknowledges the loss.
But I also want to stop going to Beale St. because I can't seem to stop letting people annoy the hell out of me. It's a character flaw. It's not everyone, hell, it's not even a majority, but it's just one or two people who might momentarily bring out a part of me that I don't like. I'm still negative at the core, and when negativity is thrown at me, I resonate negative.
Aside from not solving anything, abandoning the Beale St. crowd is problematic because they are the only social group I have left!
Reflections in the pool at Yerba Buena Gardens.
