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| Listening lab, Mandarin Training Center, Shida. |
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| Classmates, Canadian and Japanese |
Friday, March 31, 2006
Thursday, March 30, 2006
Did some further exploring along the river bikeways, heading south for the first time, away from the heart of Taipei, instead of north. I didn't go far, this was after class with only a little more than an hour of effective daylight. I wasn't even planning to go exploring, I just wanted to go to the river and play a bit of shakuhachi, which I didn't do at all during last week's five-day rain.
Even that short bit down river and Taipei becomes less of the choked urban jungle where I live. Taipei proper is no different from any megapolis around the world, but where I ended up felt like it had more character. There was more nature, too, as the landscape became more varied, and there were hints of the beautiful island that lies underneath all this concrete and humanity, which might crop up again once SARS and bird flu combine and wipe the lot of us out, but I digress.
I didn't shoot more than a few frames, though. This was all new territory, and I have a habit of getting lost and ending up in progressively worse situations, albeit always working out in the end, so I was paying more attention to where I was and where I was going and where I didn't want to go.
Fortunately I brought my map or else I don't think I'd be here writing this now. My path home did take me through a tunnel, which I think the least descriptive word I can use for the experience is "interesting". Definitely something I would prefer to do on my own bikes, and not on a clunker that has a top (impulse) speed of 27 mph, if that. Fortunately, no one cares. An old lady could be pedaling her way through a motor vehicle tunnel and no one would take notice.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Down the Dolce Vita (Peter Gabriel)
2. Country Death Song (Violent Femmes)
3. Concrete Seconds (Pinback)
4. The Thin Ice (Pink Floyd)
5. You Like Me Too Much (The Beatles)
6. Midtown (Tom Waits)
7. Lady Elect (Unwound)
8. The End (The Beatles)
9. Rise (Rainer Maria)
10. Mayonnaise (acoustic) (Smashing Pumpkins)
Even that short bit down river and Taipei becomes less of the choked urban jungle where I live. Taipei proper is no different from any megapolis around the world, but where I ended up felt like it had more character. There was more nature, too, as the landscape became more varied, and there were hints of the beautiful island that lies underneath all this concrete and humanity, which might crop up again once SARS and bird flu combine and wipe the lot of us out, but I digress.
I didn't shoot more than a few frames, though. This was all new territory, and I have a habit of getting lost and ending up in progressively worse situations, albeit always working out in the end, so I was paying more attention to where I was and where I was going and where I didn't want to go.
Fortunately I brought my map or else I don't think I'd be here writing this now. My path home did take me through a tunnel, which I think the least descriptive word I can use for the experience is "interesting". Definitely something I would prefer to do on my own bikes, and not on a clunker that has a top (impulse) speed of 27 mph, if that. Fortunately, no one cares. An old lady could be pedaling her way through a motor vehicle tunnel and no one would take notice.
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| 5:32 p.m. - Guting/Gongguan entrance to the riverside bikeways, exact same shot as earlier in the month in black & white. |
1. Down the Dolce Vita (Peter Gabriel)
2. Country Death Song (Violent Femmes)
3. Concrete Seconds (Pinback)
4. The Thin Ice (Pink Floyd)
5. You Like Me Too Much (The Beatles)
6. Midtown (Tom Waits)
7. Lady Elect (Unwound)
8. The End (The Beatles)
9. Rise (Rainer Maria)
10. Mayonnaise (acoustic) (Smashing Pumpkins)
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
I'm so not used to it not raining. I'm so not used to sticking my head way out of my bathroom window into the alley to catch the sliver of street visible and seeing sunlight and shadows, instead of wet asphalt and windshield wipers. I'm so not used to seasons changing, and it hasn't dawned on me how swelteringly sweaty hot it's going to be here very soon. No jacket required, going slow on bike wise for not overheating and dehydrating as I'm wont to do.
I rode out on the Starship Enterprise this late afternoon after class to look for a Citibank. All the locations may have been looong range walking distance in my first week here, but no more. I don't have hours of time to spend exploring on foot. Looking for Citibank turned out to be a casual rolling excursion into some new areas, some already familiar areas. Some navigating peds on sidewalks, some scooters navigating me on streets. The first Citibank I tried was near Taipei 101 which I haven't been to yet this time. That's when I ran out of film, which was fine since this wasn't supposed to be a shoot. The second Citibank was actually closer and it worked. That one was in territory I already knew, not far from the music store with the drum rooms.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Air (live) (Talking Heads)
2. (A) Face in the Crowd (The Kinks)
3. Quicksand (David Bowie)
4. Fly Me To the Moon (Julie London - ultra lounge)
5. I've Been Waiting for Tomorrow (All of My Life) (The The)
6. Be-In ("Hair")
7. I Can't Quit You, Babe (Led Zeppelin)
8. Tundra/Desert (Modest Mouse)
9. Them Heavy People (Kate Bush)
10. Status Quo (Throwing Muses)
I rode out on the Starship Enterprise this late afternoon after class to look for a Citibank. All the locations may have been looong range walking distance in my first week here, but no more. I don't have hours of time to spend exploring on foot. Looking for Citibank turned out to be a casual rolling excursion into some new areas, some already familiar areas. Some navigating peds on sidewalks, some scooters navigating me on streets. The first Citibank I tried was near Taipei 101 which I haven't been to yet this time. That's when I ran out of film, which was fine since this wasn't supposed to be a shoot. The second Citibank was actually closer and it worked. That one was in territory I already knew, not far from the music store with the drum rooms.
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| 5:33 p.m. Taipei 101, currently the tallest building in the world, from Xinyi Rd. Taipei World Trade Center at the bottom left. |
1. Air (live) (Talking Heads)
2. (A) Face in the Crowd (The Kinks)
3. Quicksand (David Bowie)
4. Fly Me To the Moon (Julie London - ultra lounge)
5. I've Been Waiting for Tomorrow (All of My Life) (The The)
6. Be-In ("Hair")
7. I Can't Quit You, Babe (Led Zeppelin)
8. Tundra/Desert (Modest Mouse)
9. Them Heavy People (Kate Bush)
10. Status Quo (Throwing Muses)
It finally stopped raining yesterday. The glare was blinding. Everyone was squinting wondering what that annoying, bright, but strangely pleasant orb was in the sky (it was the sun!). It's been so long.
My uncle flies up from Kaohsiung fairly often for business. Last night and the last time he came, there were company dinners that he took me to. Last time was raining so I had to take the MRT. I learned my lesson from last time about being aware of my alcohol limit, but it was hard because they were drinking a local liquor I wasn't familiar with, and it didn't say on the bottle in U.S. terms what proof it was, although I suspect it was greater than the standard 80.
Yea, that wasn't so good. Especially since my uncle toasts co-workers right and left and right again, and expected me to join him in every one. But I'm a very controlled drunk. I managed to get to my MRT station just fine, but prior to the mile or so walk to my apartment (in the rain), I thought "*sigh*, I don't think I'm gonna make it all the way back to my apartment OK". So I strolled in the bathroom, waiting quietly in a stall for a couple minutes, puked, flushed, and walked out thinking, "ah, how refreshing". I'm pretty boring, truth to tell.
Last night they were drinking Black Label and I knew I had to bike home, so I stopped comfortably around my limit. I'm not sure how much I drank, but I'm sure it's nothing to brag about.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. The Double Planet (Michael Hedges)
2. The Killing Jar (Siouxsie and the Banshees)
3. Dance of the Seven Veils (Liz Phair)
4. Lonely Butterfly (Rebecca)
5. Once I Had A Love (Blondie)
6. Red Rain (Peter Gabriel)
7. Deep Red (Versus)
8. Goodbye (The Sundays)
9. Kazet (Mahlathini & the Mahotella Queens)
10. Valley of One Thousand Perfumes (Mary Timony)
My uncle flies up from Kaohsiung fairly often for business. Last night and the last time he came, there were company dinners that he took me to. Last time was raining so I had to take the MRT. I learned my lesson from last time about being aware of my alcohol limit, but it was hard because they were drinking a local liquor I wasn't familiar with, and it didn't say on the bottle in U.S. terms what proof it was, although I suspect it was greater than the standard 80.
Yea, that wasn't so good. Especially since my uncle toasts co-workers right and left and right again, and expected me to join him in every one. But I'm a very controlled drunk. I managed to get to my MRT station just fine, but prior to the mile or so walk to my apartment (in the rain), I thought "*sigh*, I don't think I'm gonna make it all the way back to my apartment OK". So I strolled in the bathroom, waiting quietly in a stall for a couple minutes, puked, flushed, and walked out thinking, "ah, how refreshing". I'm pretty boring, truth to tell.
Last night they were drinking Black Label and I knew I had to bike home, so I stopped comfortably around my limit. I'm not sure how much I drank, but I'm sure it's nothing to brag about.
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| March 28, 7:44 p.m. - Me and My Uncle. I know I'm a slob, I won't speak for him, except to acknowledge he's a wonderful uncle. |
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| 8:35 p.m. - I guess my route home took me past the Da'an Park footbridge. Not surprising since it's a half block away from my apartment. |
1. The Double Planet (Michael Hedges)
2. The Killing Jar (Siouxsie and the Banshees)
3. Dance of the Seven Veils (Liz Phair)
4. Lonely Butterfly (Rebecca)
5. Once I Had A Love (Blondie)
6. Red Rain (Peter Gabriel)
7. Deep Red (Versus)
8. Goodbye (The Sundays)
9. Kazet (Mahlathini & the Mahotella Queens)
10. Valley of One Thousand Perfumes (Mary Timony)
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
One of the models of the universe that emerged out of M theory, which I think is the most updated version of String Theory, is that our universe is or is like a flat-ish membrane floating in a higher dimensional space along with other "branes" like slices of bread in a loaf. This is consistent with the latest "evidence" suggesting the "geometry" of our universe is "flat". The other branes may be other universes in an inconceivably large multi-verse or mega-verse (as if the size of our own universe is conceivable in our limited minds).
In sitting, my mind became a brane. Like a brane floating in a higher dimensional space with our entire universe in it. Like a strip of film with a movie on it. Information on a medium. My mind was the medium, what I call reality is the information. All the sights that I see, all the images in my mind, everything that has registered through my senses as perception are containable on this medium I call mind. They aren’t an inherent reality "out there".
In sitting, thoughts and images come and go. Past, present, future. Identity, ego, I, me, mine. But they are just information on a medium. Even my thinking they are just information on a medium is part of that information on a medium, and I watch my mind as it slips through various states of perceptions and conceptions of reality, which is just a brane, lacking inherent reality.
The recently published fourth translation of the so-called Tibetan Book of the Dead is the first translation of the complete cycle of works that make it up. The first three translations popularized in the modern, liberal world have only been Chapter Eleven and a few stray sections. Chapter Four of the complete cycle is entitled "The Introduction to Awareness: Natural Liberation through Naked Perception". Naked perception.
Just meditating on those words and what they could possibly mean, while also envisioning my mind as a medium and reality just information on the medium. Naked perception, that’s what Chapter Four is cutting to. It’s easy to just blow by those words, thinking an intuitive idea of naked perception is enough, but it’s the heart of it, the point of meditation, the point of practice. Zen describes it as when mind and body fall away. Naked perception is when all perception of forms disappear, and all there is is perception. No mind, no observer, no meditator.
Or not.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Indian Song (Elastica)
2. Dumb Fun (Versus)
3. You Really Got Me (live) (The Kinks)
4. Stone the Crows ("Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat")
5. Spoon (Cibo Matto)
6. Fugue in G Minor "The Greater" (J.S. Bach)
7. Symphony No. 6, II. Andante molto mosso (Beethoven)
8. I'll Wait (Van Halen)
9. Mestra Tata (Charlie Hunter Quintet)
10. Play My Music (Exodus Steel Orchestra)
In sitting, my mind became a brane. Like a brane floating in a higher dimensional space with our entire universe in it. Like a strip of film with a movie on it. Information on a medium. My mind was the medium, what I call reality is the information. All the sights that I see, all the images in my mind, everything that has registered through my senses as perception are containable on this medium I call mind. They aren’t an inherent reality "out there".
In sitting, thoughts and images come and go. Past, present, future. Identity, ego, I, me, mine. But they are just information on a medium. Even my thinking they are just information on a medium is part of that information on a medium, and I watch my mind as it slips through various states of perceptions and conceptions of reality, which is just a brane, lacking inherent reality.
The recently published fourth translation of the so-called Tibetan Book of the Dead is the first translation of the complete cycle of works that make it up. The first three translations popularized in the modern, liberal world have only been Chapter Eleven and a few stray sections. Chapter Four of the complete cycle is entitled "The Introduction to Awareness: Natural Liberation through Naked Perception". Naked perception.
Just meditating on those words and what they could possibly mean, while also envisioning my mind as a medium and reality just information on the medium. Naked perception, that’s what Chapter Four is cutting to. It’s easy to just blow by those words, thinking an intuitive idea of naked perception is enough, but it’s the heart of it, the point of meditation, the point of practice. Zen describes it as when mind and body fall away. Naked perception is when all perception of forms disappear, and all there is is perception. No mind, no observer, no meditator.
Or not.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Indian Song (Elastica)
2. Dumb Fun (Versus)
3. You Really Got Me (live) (The Kinks)
4. Stone the Crows ("Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat")
5. Spoon (Cibo Matto)
6. Fugue in G Minor "The Greater" (J.S. Bach)
7. Symphony No. 6, II. Andante molto mosso (Beethoven)
8. I'll Wait (Van Halen)
9. Mestra Tata (Charlie Hunter Quintet)
10. Play My Music (Exodus Steel Orchestra)
Monday, March 27, 2006
Just when I really felt it should stop raining, it rained harder and longer than ever. Actually I like that better than namby pamby mist and dreary drizzle. If it's gonna rain, let it rain, and when it rains, strap on the iPod and head out and get wet despite umberella and weather jacket (and grab something to eat at the (empty) night market while I'm at it). I decided I needed to finish this roll of lomo fisheye. I decided I need to be shooting more with it, regardless of weather or lack of change in daily routine. Click, click, click. Toy camera with the big nose.
Not fisheye:
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Silverfuck (live) (Smashing Pumpkins)
2. I Can't Give Back the Love I Feel for You (Rita Wright)
3. Just Like U Said It Would B (Sinead O'Connor)
4. Napoleon (live) (Ani DiFranco)
5. Heroes (live) (David Bowie)
6. Symphony in Blue (Kate Bush)
7. Beautiful (Carole King)
8. Stormy Weather (Lena Horne)
9. Midnight Rambler (live) (The Rolling Stones)
10. The Chemistry Between Us (Suede)
Not fisheye:
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| March 22, 10:05 a.m. - upper floor of the main public library on a dreary day |
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| 10:49 a.m. - Taipei 101 from an upper floor of the main public library on a dreary day |
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| March 23, 1:27 p.m. - tired language students, Mandarin Training Center, Shida. On a dreary day. |
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| March 24, 9:13 a.m. - Da'an Park east, on the way to the main public library. On a dreary day. |
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| 10:57 a.m. - stairwell shot in color. On a wonderful, beautiful, rainbow-filled day. Or not. |
1. Silverfuck (live) (Smashing Pumpkins)
2. I Can't Give Back the Love I Feel for You (Rita Wright)
3. Just Like U Said It Would B (Sinead O'Connor)
4. Napoleon (live) (Ani DiFranco)
5. Heroes (live) (David Bowie)
6. Symphony in Blue (Kate Bush)
7. Beautiful (Carole King)
8. Stormy Weather (Lena Horne)
9. Midnight Rambler (live) (The Rolling Stones)
10. The Chemistry Between Us (Suede)
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
I passed on my first social engagement last night. Proud of myself for having done so. I'm not here to make friends or be social. I'm here to figure things out.
I was tempted to go, but then reminded myself of all the empty social engagements I had hope for in San Francisco. What would be the point of going to dinner with these classmates I don't know and don't know me and their friends. English wouldn't have been the common language either, so I would have been way on the outside, as my Japanese is beyond lost.
I'm starting to have trouble with Mandarin as well, and we're only in the 4th week. I suck at languages. I can test well, I can do languages if it's a matter of analysis and figuring things out. But as a matter of communication, as a matter of expression, as a matter of spontaneity, I've never been able to get a grasp on another language.
I'll keep trying, though. Trying hard to not let it get me down.
I've been wanting to email Madoka for a while now, but it has come to feel that she would have a more accurate picture of me if I just didn't write. That's the way it is here, too. As soon as I let some information out, it's inaccurate because of all the information it leaves out.
I went to law school. Right there, everything implied about me in that bit of information is wrong. It's the same with anything else that can be said about me. That's how unconnected I've become. I haven't figured out if it bothers me yet. It might be great.
But doesn't help in regard to writing to Madoka. Whether I gloss things over superficially or am brutally honest, whatever I imagine to say to her turns inaccurate in a few sentences. Anyway, I can't shake the feeling that if I just didn't write, it just wouldn't make any difference.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Pumping On Your Stereo (Supergrass)
2. I Shall Scream ("Oliver")
3. He Is, She Is (live) (Mission of Burma)
4. Hold On ("Secret Garden")
5. Capriccio Italien (Tchaikovsky)
6. Wonder Wonder (Edith Frost)
7. Stand (Sly & the Family Stone)
8. The Absence of God (Rilo Kiley)
9. I'm No Heroine (Ani DiFranco)
10. Wake Up (XTC)
I was tempted to go, but then reminded myself of all the empty social engagements I had hope for in San Francisco. What would be the point of going to dinner with these classmates I don't know and don't know me and their friends. English wouldn't have been the common language either, so I would have been way on the outside, as my Japanese is beyond lost.
I'm starting to have trouble with Mandarin as well, and we're only in the 4th week. I suck at languages. I can test well, I can do languages if it's a matter of analysis and figuring things out. But as a matter of communication, as a matter of expression, as a matter of spontaneity, I've never been able to get a grasp on another language.
I'll keep trying, though. Trying hard to not let it get me down.
I've been wanting to email Madoka for a while now, but it has come to feel that she would have a more accurate picture of me if I just didn't write. That's the way it is here, too. As soon as I let some information out, it's inaccurate because of all the information it leaves out.
I went to law school. Right there, everything implied about me in that bit of information is wrong. It's the same with anything else that can be said about me. That's how unconnected I've become. I haven't figured out if it bothers me yet. It might be great.
But doesn't help in regard to writing to Madoka. Whether I gloss things over superficially or am brutally honest, whatever I imagine to say to her turns inaccurate in a few sentences. Anyway, I can't shake the feeling that if I just didn't write, it just wouldn't make any difference.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Pumping On Your Stereo (Supergrass)
2. I Shall Scream ("Oliver")
3. He Is, She Is (live) (Mission of Burma)
4. Hold On ("Secret Garden")
5. Capriccio Italien (Tchaikovsky)
6. Wonder Wonder (Edith Frost)
7. Stand (Sly & the Family Stone)
8. The Absence of God (Rilo Kiley)
9. I'm No Heroine (Ani DiFranco)
10. Wake Up (XTC)
Saturday, March 18, 2006
It looks like shooting will be confined to weekends. With afternoon classes, there's no time to go shooting during the week. I bought an old clunker of a bike this week and today I went exploring for the first time in daylight hours. Actually today I was supposed to go to a one-day retreat, but I missed meeting up with other people to catch the bus, so I went riding and shooting along the riverside bikeways.
It's difficult to fathom these bikeways. I think Taipei tried to copy the Japanese model of turning riverbanks into recreational areas that double as flood zones, but where the Japanese are ingenious about civic engineering, Chinese, and by extension Taiwanese, have no idea what they're doing and for whom, as long as they get money and/or political favor.
But that's just my first general impression in regard to how difficult it is to get to these bikeways in the first place by bike. It's not like you can ride to the river and find your way to the bikeways easily and conveniently. You have to know exactly where the access points are, what kind they are (if you can just ride in or if you have to go up a footbridge – not something I'm willing to do on this heavy old clunker of a bike), and you still have to compete with motor scooter traffic which also have roads they can use along the rivers. The bikeways themselves are really nice, but access to them seems to have been an afterthought.
Riverside shots: I put the 28-200mm zoom lens on the Pentax ZX-5n for today. As much as I love the 50mm lens, for wide open spaces and subjects, the flexibility of a zoom lens was absolutely dreamy.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Wish You Were Here (Pink Floyd)
2. Warm Valley (Duke Ellington)
3. On A Plain (Nirvana)
4. Force Ten (live) (Rush)
5. Many Too Many (Genesis)
6. Freak Fest (Charlie Hunter Quintet)
7. Dos Gardenias (Ibrahim Ferrer)
8. Strange Magic (Electric Light Orchestra)
9. Bring the Noise (Public Enemy)
10. Forgotten Sons (Marillion)
It's difficult to fathom these bikeways. I think Taipei tried to copy the Japanese model of turning riverbanks into recreational areas that double as flood zones, but where the Japanese are ingenious about civic engineering, Chinese, and by extension Taiwanese, have no idea what they're doing and for whom, as long as they get money and/or political favor.
But that's just my first general impression in regard to how difficult it is to get to these bikeways in the first place by bike. It's not like you can ride to the river and find your way to the bikeways easily and conveniently. You have to know exactly where the access points are, what kind they are (if you can just ride in or if you have to go up a footbridge – not something I'm willing to do on this heavy old clunker of a bike), and you still have to compete with motor scooter traffic which also have roads they can use along the rivers. The bikeways themselves are really nice, but access to them seems to have been an afterthought.
Riverside shots: I put the 28-200mm zoom lens on the Pentax ZX-5n for today. As much as I love the 50mm lens, for wide open spaces and subjects, the flexibility of a zoom lens was absolutely dreamy.
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| I recall being told this is Dadaocheng in Datong district, a popular place for photographers to shoot sunsets. |
 |
| raw scan. The closest riverside access point from my apartment. Gongguan, I think it's fair to call. |
 |
| Just north of the riverside access point, also a raw scan, eventually this would be developed into an expansive multi-recreational use park along the riverside. |
 |
| 7:32 a.m. - I think they were going for "Caution!". And instead of designing a safe intersection, they just warn you a lot of accidents happen and you might become one of them. |
 |
| 8:58 a.m. - Dadaocheng in color. |
 |
| 4:35 p.m. - Nifty maps of the riverside bikeways are posted at various points. There is a "You Are Here" indicator showing where this was shot. Dadaocheng is off the map a little to the north. |
 |
| 4:50 p.m. - On the map this is Huazhong Riverside Park. But I should point out that from the map pic to this point would not take 15 minutes just riding. More like 5. |
 |
| 4:59 p.m. |
1. Wish You Were Here (Pink Floyd)
2. Warm Valley (Duke Ellington)
3. On A Plain (Nirvana)
4. Force Ten (live) (Rush)
5. Many Too Many (Genesis)
6. Freak Fest (Charlie Hunter Quintet)
7. Dos Gardenias (Ibrahim Ferrer)
8. Strange Magic (Electric Light Orchestra)
9. Bring the Noise (Public Enemy)
10. Forgotten Sons (Marillion)
Sona 嗩吶 (Chinese double reed "trumpet").
March 18, 2006 - Sona players (I know that from ethnomusicology classes from college) practicing by the Danshui riverside. I've seen these guys practicing here more than once, so I think they do it regularly. And if you listen to this thing, you can figure out why they do it here. Annoying the shit out of people in public is better than annoying the shit out of your neighbors. I thought I was open-minded musically and culturally, but catch me in the wrong mood and I'd be stabbing people after five minutes of this. I think 9 out of 10 people would prefer to hear me wheezing away on the shakuhachi. Or not. Eight maybe.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Fly Me to the Moon (Yoko Takahashi - "Neon Genesis Evangelion")
2. I Just Want to See His Face (The Rolling Stones)
3. Look A Ghost In the Eye (Mary Timony)
4. Accidently Kelly Street (Frente!)
5. The Morning Fog (Kate Bush)
6. Jamming (Bob Marley & the Wailers)
7. Corpse Pose (Unwound)
8. Sunday in the Park with George ("Sunday in the Park with George" - Sondheim)
9. Seven Years After (Princess Princess)
10. Kawa no Nagarewa (The Boom)
March 18, 2006 - Sona players (I know that from ethnomusicology classes from college) practicing by the Danshui riverside. I've seen these guys practicing here more than once, so I think they do it regularly. And if you listen to this thing, you can figure out why they do it here. Annoying the shit out of people in public is better than annoying the shit out of your neighbors. I thought I was open-minded musically and culturally, but catch me in the wrong mood and I'd be stabbing people after five minutes of this. I think 9 out of 10 people would prefer to hear me wheezing away on the shakuhachi. Or not. Eight maybe.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Fly Me to the Moon (Yoko Takahashi - "Neon Genesis Evangelion")
2. I Just Want to See His Face (The Rolling Stones)
3. Look A Ghost In the Eye (Mary Timony)
4. Accidently Kelly Street (Frente!)
5. The Morning Fog (Kate Bush)
6. Jamming (Bob Marley & the Wailers)
7. Corpse Pose (Unwound)
8. Sunday in the Park with George ("Sunday in the Park with George" - Sondheim)
9. Seven Years After (Princess Princess)
10. Kawa no Nagarewa (The Boom)
Thursday, March 16, 2006
I've been here three weeks. The sun has rarely come out, but when it has, it has been at key points. The sun coming out made them key points.
I'm still waiting for my landlady to get ADSL for the building. Until then, my internet time is limited to a couple hours in the morning when I go to the public library, which I discovered this past Sunday, where there is wireless on the 8th floor. Before I discovered the public library, my internet time was limited to a few hours after class, where there was wireless on the 7th floor. Lugging my laptop to school sucked.
Limited internet access is probably a good thing for me.
I bought a second-hand bike two nights ago for US$20. It's a piece of crap, but it will get me around and significantly cut down on travel time wherever I go. I'm sure in three months time, it will have paid for itself, but in terms of luxury, it will pay for itself many times over long before then. I don't know if it will last three months time, even with me toning down my riding style to "lobotomized", compared to how I rode in the U.S. I've named it the "Starship Enterprise".
This morning was an anti-teaching sitting. Key teachings that have resonated recently describe the true nature of mind as utterly empty and without inherent existence; naturally resonant and radiant; and of an uncreated nature, not coming from anywhere, not going anywhere. I searched for my "mind" and found that it is quite fullsome, as having an inherent existence, not at all resonant or radiant, and having been created, able to be destroyed. It was good, I'm coming along nicely, now having a clue what I'm not getting.
I get to play drums tonight.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Afterglow (Genesis)
2. Sparky (Kristin Hersh)
3. Norwegian Wood (Victor Wooten)
4. A Sermon (The Police)
5. Pull Out the Pin (Kate Bush)
6. Radio-Friendly Unit Shifter (Nirvana)
7. Platonic Dance (Anzen Chitai)
8. Spark (Tori Amos)
9. Start Together (Sleater-Kinney)
10. Spare Change (Michael Hedges)
I'm still waiting for my landlady to get ADSL for the building. Until then, my internet time is limited to a couple hours in the morning when I go to the public library, which I discovered this past Sunday, where there is wireless on the 8th floor. Before I discovered the public library, my internet time was limited to a few hours after class, where there was wireless on the 7th floor. Lugging my laptop to school sucked.
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| March 17, 10:38 a.m. - Shots from the stairwell of the main public library. This is looking left (south) across Da'an Forest Park. I live along "Da'An Park South" (Heping E. Rd) and my low-rise building is in this shot next to the church. |
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| Looking right (north) |
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| Looking west. The pyramid structure is the roof of a pavilion. |
I bought a second-hand bike two nights ago for US$20. It's a piece of crap, but it will get me around and significantly cut down on travel time wherever I go. I'm sure in three months time, it will have paid for itself, but in terms of luxury, it will pay for itself many times over long before then. I don't know if it will last three months time, even with me toning down my riding style to "lobotomized", compared to how I rode in the U.S. I've named it the "Starship Enterprise".
This morning was an anti-teaching sitting. Key teachings that have resonated recently describe the true nature of mind as utterly empty and without inherent existence; naturally resonant and radiant; and of an uncreated nature, not coming from anywhere, not going anywhere. I searched for my "mind" and found that it is quite fullsome, as having an inherent existence, not at all resonant or radiant, and having been created, able to be destroyed. It was good, I'm coming along nicely, now having a clue what I'm not getting.
I get to play drums tonight.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Afterglow (Genesis)
2. Sparky (Kristin Hersh)
3. Norwegian Wood (Victor Wooten)
4. A Sermon (The Police)
5. Pull Out the Pin (Kate Bush)
6. Radio-Friendly Unit Shifter (Nirvana)
7. Platonic Dance (Anzen Chitai)
8. Spark (Tori Amos)
9. Start Together (Sleater-Kinney)
10. Spare Change (Michael Hedges)
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
My neighbor in my apartment building talked my ear off the other night.
She's an African American from the deep South, displaced because of Hurricane Katrina. She thought she would ride out the disaster by ex-patting in Taiwan. After six months, she is going back, but she's not sure where she'll end up, as the Gulf Coast is still a disaster area.
She had nothing good to say about Taiwanese and the racism she encountered here. I listened deeply to her, recognizing that she didn't want feedback, she wanted to vent, she wanted to rant.
She's very tall and imposing and her skin tone is closer to African blacks than the milked down tones of Americans, so the Taiwanese judgment of her racial appearance was particularly harsh. For one English teaching job, they knew she was black, but they rejected her when she came in for her interview because she was the "wrong kind of black". Whoa, dude!
It was an odd moment standing there listening to her invective against Taiwanese, hearing how close she was getting to being racist, having heard similar sentiments from white people in the U.S. who were clearly racist.
What she experienced was racism – it pertained to her race. But she wasn't being racist. Her venom was focused just on Taiwanese as a culture and nationality, not on Asians as a race. She was able to vent to me because she wasn't racist, she saw me as a fellow American.
Understanding this, I could listen to her. Her experience was real and valid, and her anger was totally understandable and justified. If I was in a culture and was insulted and humiliated and dehumanized because of my race, I wouldn't have anything good to say about it, and for a long time during and after college, I didn't.
My hope, and I hope I expressed this well enough to her, is that when she goes back to the U.S., her bad experience with Taiwanese doesn't turn into racism against Asians. It's a slippery slope, anger is a seductive emotion. Look what happened to Anakin. It could happen to any of us. I even had asthma when I was a kid.
She's an African American from the deep South, displaced because of Hurricane Katrina. She thought she would ride out the disaster by ex-patting in Taiwan. After six months, she is going back, but she's not sure where she'll end up, as the Gulf Coast is still a disaster area.
She had nothing good to say about Taiwanese and the racism she encountered here. I listened deeply to her, recognizing that she didn't want feedback, she wanted to vent, she wanted to rant.
She's very tall and imposing and her skin tone is closer to African blacks than the milked down tones of Americans, so the Taiwanese judgment of her racial appearance was particularly harsh. For one English teaching job, they knew she was black, but they rejected her when she came in for her interview because she was the "wrong kind of black". Whoa, dude!
It was an odd moment standing there listening to her invective against Taiwanese, hearing how close she was getting to being racist, having heard similar sentiments from white people in the U.S. who were clearly racist.
What she experienced was racism – it pertained to her race. But she wasn't being racist. Her venom was focused just on Taiwanese as a culture and nationality, not on Asians as a race. She was able to vent to me because she wasn't racist, she saw me as a fellow American.
Understanding this, I could listen to her. Her experience was real and valid, and her anger was totally understandable and justified. If I was in a culture and was insulted and humiliated and dehumanized because of my race, I wouldn't have anything good to say about it, and for a long time during and after college, I didn't.
My hope, and I hope I expressed this well enough to her, is that when she goes back to the U.S., her bad experience with Taiwanese doesn't turn into racism against Asians. It's a slippery slope, anger is a seductive emotion. Look what happened to Anakin. It could happen to any of us. I even had asthma when I was a kid.
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| 1:22 p.m. Shida's Mandarin Training Center, central atrium. Sony Cybershot P-9 didn't have panorama or stitch features. The windows are the classrooms, ground floor had a study room. |
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| 6:14 p.m. - Bought a bike and immediately went out onto the riverside bikeways, but it was already getting dark. |
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| March 14, 5:17 p.m. - default shot |
Monday, March 13, 2006
Why Do We Remember the Past, And Not the Future: Part I
I read an article on Loop Quantum Gravity, which is currently being developed in the scientific community as an alternative to String/M Theory. String/M Theory is still the most viable theory to merge quantum mechanics and Einstein's Theory of Relativity, but it suffers from overwhelming complexity and huge leaps of conceptualization, and is often criticized for being untestable. It's a theory, and for what it offers, that is all it will remain.
In brief, quantum mechanics is the physics of the very, very tiny, and Relativity is the physics of the very, very large (massive). The problem is that Relativity breaks down at the quantum level, and quantum mechanics don't apply on a larger scale. How can two separate, irreconcilable laws of physics apply in one universe? String/M Theory and Loop Quantum Gravity are "theories of everything" because they try to reconcile the quantum and relativistic realms.
Loop Quantum Gravity is so simple that in comparison it makes String/M Theory look like, well, rocket science. It's so simple that even I understood the basic idea. Loop Quantum Gravity also makes predictions that will be testable within a few years.
Mind you, I don't really understand the physics of either String/M Theory or Loop Quantum Gravity at all, and I won’t go into it. I just read about the ideas and concepts, the popular interpretation of the theories, and get fascinated without any real grasp of the technicalities and specifications of the theories.
Maybe it’s sorta like appreciating classical music without analyzing the music theory involved. You can appreciate the music aesthetically, but the theory is a whole nother dimension of appreciation, and not many people are willing to go through a piece phrase by phrase to discover how it works.
That's alright, though. Half the game is conceptualization, the ideas. The other half, the meat of the physics and why mathematicians and physicists get paid is the hardcore theory and the math. Lots of upper level math. The concept behind String Theory was around for a while, but it didn't come of age until the math worked. Loop Quantum Gravity isn't at the stature of String/M Theory because they are still working on the math.
The Loop Quantum Gravity article I read was included in two Special Editions put out by Scientific American, one on the “frontiers of physics”, and the other one I mentioned before on time. I think that gives an idea of the promise Scientific American believes Loop Quantum Gravity holds. Especially since, although the article mentions time, it is hardly the focus of the article.
Its inclusion in the time edition is what got me thinking, since that’s what’s been on my mind recently. I once did a mind exercise, imagining the planet Earth as the size of an atom, or as an atom. Either shrink the planet down to the quantum level, or make the Earth an atom and blow it up to its current size.
Somehow in the mind exercise, time got speeded up. With the Earth as an atom, we and our lives become subatomic particles, governed by Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle, zipping in and out of existence so fast that our lives cannot be pinpointed as having a location or speed (or was it direction? I forget) at the same time. Only by some function of probability can we be said to have existed.
Expand the perspective out some more, and it’s 80 odd years of our lives occurring in the blink of a microsecond. That’s our planet revolving around the sun 80 times in that microsecond! But it’s our planet revolving around the sun – Relativity. Looking a little quantum, maybe?
So is our current irreconcilability of quantum mechanics and Relativity not just a matter of size and mass, but time? We already know how screwy time is in Relativity. How screwy is time on a quantum level? Does time even exist on the quantum level or is it also subject to Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle? Can the difference between quantum and relativistic be a matter of time?
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Packt Like Sardines in a Crushed Tin Box (Radiohead)
2. Before You Cry (Camera Obscura)
3. Cowbirds (Throwing Muses)
4. Father, Son (Peter Gabriel)
5. The Bed's Too Big Without You (The Police)
6. Next ("Pacific Overtures" - Sondheim)
7. Donna Lee (Jaco Pastorius)
8. Say Goodbye (Throwing Muses)
9. Les Boys (Dire Straits)
10. Paradox (Kansas)
I read an article on Loop Quantum Gravity, which is currently being developed in the scientific community as an alternative to String/M Theory. String/M Theory is still the most viable theory to merge quantum mechanics and Einstein's Theory of Relativity, but it suffers from overwhelming complexity and huge leaps of conceptualization, and is often criticized for being untestable. It's a theory, and for what it offers, that is all it will remain.
In brief, quantum mechanics is the physics of the very, very tiny, and Relativity is the physics of the very, very large (massive). The problem is that Relativity breaks down at the quantum level, and quantum mechanics don't apply on a larger scale. How can two separate, irreconcilable laws of physics apply in one universe? String/M Theory and Loop Quantum Gravity are "theories of everything" because they try to reconcile the quantum and relativistic realms.
Loop Quantum Gravity is so simple that in comparison it makes String/M Theory look like, well, rocket science. It's so simple that even I understood the basic idea. Loop Quantum Gravity also makes predictions that will be testable within a few years.
Mind you, I don't really understand the physics of either String/M Theory or Loop Quantum Gravity at all, and I won’t go into it. I just read about the ideas and concepts, the popular interpretation of the theories, and get fascinated without any real grasp of the technicalities and specifications of the theories.
Maybe it’s sorta like appreciating classical music without analyzing the music theory involved. You can appreciate the music aesthetically, but the theory is a whole nother dimension of appreciation, and not many people are willing to go through a piece phrase by phrase to discover how it works.
That's alright, though. Half the game is conceptualization, the ideas. The other half, the meat of the physics and why mathematicians and physicists get paid is the hardcore theory and the math. Lots of upper level math. The concept behind String Theory was around for a while, but it didn't come of age until the math worked. Loop Quantum Gravity isn't at the stature of String/M Theory because they are still working on the math.
The Loop Quantum Gravity article I read was included in two Special Editions put out by Scientific American, one on the “frontiers of physics”, and the other one I mentioned before on time. I think that gives an idea of the promise Scientific American believes Loop Quantum Gravity holds. Especially since, although the article mentions time, it is hardly the focus of the article.
Its inclusion in the time edition is what got me thinking, since that’s what’s been on my mind recently. I once did a mind exercise, imagining the planet Earth as the size of an atom, or as an atom. Either shrink the planet down to the quantum level, or make the Earth an atom and blow it up to its current size.
Somehow in the mind exercise, time got speeded up. With the Earth as an atom, we and our lives become subatomic particles, governed by Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle, zipping in and out of existence so fast that our lives cannot be pinpointed as having a location or speed (or was it direction? I forget) at the same time. Only by some function of probability can we be said to have existed.
Expand the perspective out some more, and it’s 80 odd years of our lives occurring in the blink of a microsecond. That’s our planet revolving around the sun 80 times in that microsecond! But it’s our planet revolving around the sun – Relativity. Looking a little quantum, maybe?
So is our current irreconcilability of quantum mechanics and Relativity not just a matter of size and mass, but time? We already know how screwy time is in Relativity. How screwy is time on a quantum level? Does time even exist on the quantum level or is it also subject to Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle? Can the difference between quantum and relativistic be a matter of time?
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Packt Like Sardines in a Crushed Tin Box (Radiohead)
2. Before You Cry (Camera Obscura)
3. Cowbirds (Throwing Muses)
4. Father, Son (Peter Gabriel)
5. The Bed's Too Big Without You (The Police)
6. Next ("Pacific Overtures" - Sondheim)
7. Donna Lee (Jaco Pastorius)
8. Say Goodbye (Throwing Muses)
9. Les Boys (Dire Straits)
10. Paradox (Kansas)
Sunday, March 12, 2006
On this rainy day, I found the wireless hotspot at the Taipei Public library after a morning of failed connection at the Starbucks on the corner. I really scored with the location of my apartment. It turns out the library is also across the street from the park I live across the street from. It's even closer than school is, but in the opposite direction.
Why the library is in this location, I don't know. There's nothing around here that would draw attention to it as a public facility, no civic center, no city hall, no town center. The view of the park is great from the upper floors, and when the sun comes out again, if it ever comes out again, I'll get some more shots.
Last Sunday, I met a group of people in the park who were drumming – marching style, just snare drums. I ended up joining them, giving my traditional grip and paltry reading skills (that I didn't even know I had – I never learned to read drum music) a work out. Unfortunately, they turned out to be part of a political party – one that I don't like.
They invited me to join them at a protest rally today and I ended up saying yes, but when I got there, I just couldn't do it. It was the equivalent of ending up in the middle of a Republican or pro-life rally in the U.S. So I just left. I'll play with them in the park, but no politics. I'll tell them my family told me to stay away from Taiwan politics, which isn't far from the truth. My sister-in-law's family told me I was banned from going to the rally.
The good that came out of it was that after I left, I went on a photostroll and came across a music shop with rehearsal rooms with drums set up that you can rent for less than two bucks an hour. You just have to call a day in advance and reserve a room.
Pentax ZX-5n, Ilford XP2 Super film:
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Waydown (Modest Mouse)
2. Runaway (Marillion)
3. Here Comes the Supernatural Anaesthetist (live) (Genesis)
4. Land of Confusion (live) (Genesis)
5. A Soapbox Opera (live) (Supertramp)
6. Symphony No. 39, II. Andante con moto (Mozart)
7. The Negotiation Limerick File (The Beastie Boys)
8. Miss Gradenko (The Police)
9. Lifted Bells (June of 44)
10. Wrong (Archers of Loaf)
Why the library is in this location, I don't know. There's nothing around here that would draw attention to it as a public facility, no civic center, no city hall, no town center. The view of the park is great from the upper floors, and when the sun comes out again, if it ever comes out again, I'll get some more shots.
Last Sunday, I met a group of people in the park who were drumming – marching style, just snare drums. I ended up joining them, giving my traditional grip and paltry reading skills (that I didn't even know I had – I never learned to read drum music) a work out. Unfortunately, they turned out to be part of a political party – one that I don't like.
They invited me to join them at a protest rally today and I ended up saying yes, but when I got there, I just couldn't do it. It was the equivalent of ending up in the middle of a Republican or pro-life rally in the U.S. So I just left. I'll play with them in the park, but no politics. I'll tell them my family told me to stay away from Taiwan politics, which isn't far from the truth. My sister-in-law's family told me I was banned from going to the rally.
The good that came out of it was that after I left, I went on a photostroll and came across a music shop with rehearsal rooms with drums set up that you can rent for less than two bucks an hour. You just have to call a day in advance and reserve a room.
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| 1:09 p.m. - Technology Building MRT station, brown line |
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| 1:28 p.m. - hints of something political I opted out of |
 |
| 5:45 p.m. - Xinyi Road looking west to Taipei 101 from Jianguo South Rd. Evidence of construction of what would become the Xinyi MRT line (right side, mid-frame). |
 |
| raw scan. Taipei 101 from Sun Yat-Sen Memorial Hall |
 |
| raw scan. What an elevated MRT brown line station looks like from the ground. |
1. Waydown (Modest Mouse)
2. Runaway (Marillion)
3. Here Comes the Supernatural Anaesthetist (live) (Genesis)
4. Land of Confusion (live) (Genesis)
5. A Soapbox Opera (live) (Supertramp)
6. Symphony No. 39, II. Andante con moto (Mozart)
7. The Negotiation Limerick File (The Beastie Boys)
8. Miss Gradenko (The Police)
9. Lifted Bells (June of 44)
10. Wrong (Archers of Loaf)
Saturday, March 11, 2006
I went to the monastery practice center again at Xin Beitou. I haven't been getting enough sleep, so when my alarm went off, I contemplated bagging, but then remembered reading something resonant about having slept for countless lifetimes, and having had enough, now is not the time to sleep.
What that means is variable, I shouldn't wonder. Then I asked myself if I wanted to go, and as soon as the answer was 'yes', I got a move on. Going to the practice center serves the purpose of reminding me why I don't enter a monastery – I don't get along with people. Any of them. Although ironically, the monks at Deer Park were the best connection I made in years, and still I walked away. Still I managed to alienate people. So as long as I have a choice in the matter, I'll stick with a solitary, hermit-like goal. I'll stick with the internet. As far as practice goes, monastery/no monastery, doesn't matter.
I didn't start shooting until I got to Xin Beitou, but then remembered that I shot around Xin Beitou last week. Concerned that I might shoot the same things over again, I only shot things that I knew were unique about this time.
After the morning session, since Xin Beitou is so far up the Danshui line on the MRT, I decided to go to end of the line to Danshui and walked around there for several hours shooting. It was neat up there, although not what I expected. I didn't expect the huge crowds of people and the boardwalk atmosphere.
End of the line, mouth of the Danshui River, I was expecting something more natural and peaceful. I got some shots that I really liked through the viewfinder, and forgot to shoot safety frames of those shots. I'm usually economical with my frames and don't shoot more than one frame of a subject unless I know something was wrong about the first frame, like composition, camera tilt (it's a big problem for me, apparently one of my legs is shorter than the other), or metering. But with a subject I really like, I do like to shoot at least one more safety frame.
What that means is variable, I shouldn't wonder. Then I asked myself if I wanted to go, and as soon as the answer was 'yes', I got a move on. Going to the practice center serves the purpose of reminding me why I don't enter a monastery – I don't get along with people. Any of them. Although ironically, the monks at Deer Park were the best connection I made in years, and still I walked away. Still I managed to alienate people. So as long as I have a choice in the matter, I'll stick with a solitary, hermit-like goal. I'll stick with the internet. As far as practice goes, monastery/no monastery, doesn't matter.
I didn't start shooting until I got to Xin Beitou, but then remembered that I shot around Xin Beitou last week. Concerned that I might shoot the same things over again, I only shot things that I knew were unique about this time.
After the morning session, since Xin Beitou is so far up the Danshui line on the MRT, I decided to go to end of the line to Danshui and walked around there for several hours shooting. It was neat up there, although not what I expected. I didn't expect the huge crowds of people and the boardwalk atmosphere.
End of the line, mouth of the Danshui River, I was expecting something more natural and peaceful. I got some shots that I really liked through the viewfinder, and forgot to shoot safety frames of those shots. I'm usually economical with my frames and don't shoot more than one frame of a subject unless I know something was wrong about the first frame, like composition, camera tilt (it's a big problem for me, apparently one of my legs is shorter than the other), or metering. But with a subject I really like, I do like to shoot at least one more safety frame.
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| 1:08 p.m. - fishing boats? Danshui. |
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| 1:56 p.m., Danshui |
Friday, March 10, 2006
Taipei, Taiwan: Wings of Desire
During breaks from three hour afternoon classes, sometimes I stand by the ninth floor windows and look down at the people, the lives. What is their motivation? What are they doing and why are they doing it? I don't ask why I don't want what they want. I know I don't, and I don't have to ask why. I want to know why they don't want what I want.
What am I looking at when I look at these people? What were they doing last night? Did they have sex? Did they get into a fight with a loved one? Did they have an ordinary good time with friends? What is the next frustration they will encounter and how will they deal with it? What will be their next meaningful joy? How exactly are they moving through this world and this life?
I only see one ordinary moment, a slice, and they all look the same to me. They are all happy and satisfied with their lives. They are just moving from one thing to another thing, and everything is just swell, and if not, they will get through it. I can't imagine any of them having sex. I can't imagine any of them being fiercely and wildly in love. I can't imagine any of them having a major life crisis.
There was that woman on the MRT who was dressed hip, but looked like she had a long night and could have used a few more hours of sleep. Where did she sleep last night?
My classmates are the closest people to me. I see them every weekday for three hours. I'm not here to be social, I'm not here to be social with them. I don't have to put on any act for them. I don't need to try to impress them. They don't need to know me. I'm here to observe, and I'm tracking bits of information I gather about them as time goes on.
They have all come from different places to study here. They all have some story. I have tracked their countries of origin. I've gathered some cities. In my map of the universe, I still don't know where any of them live in Taipei. I don't know what they were doing before they came to class, I don't know where they go after they leave.
2 Japanese women, one from Sapporo, one from Tokyo.
1 Canadian man, father Chinese, mother French.
1 French man. He has studied Chinese before.
1 English man. He is dating a Taiwanese woman.
1 Taiwanese American woman from the Bay Area.
1 Korean woman from Seoul. She is moving this weekend.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. I'm On E (Blondie)
2. In Or Out (live) (Ani DiFranco)
3. We Love Your Apathy (Skunk Anansie)
4. The Fox and Hound (Mary Timony)
5. A Perfect World (Pizzicato Five)
6. This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody) (Talking Heads)
7. I Am One (live) (Smashing Pumpkins)
8. Gatekeeper (Feist)
9. Try to Remember (reprise) ("The Fantasticks")
10. Glory of the 80's (Tori Amos)
During breaks from three hour afternoon classes, sometimes I stand by the ninth floor windows and look down at the people, the lives. What is their motivation? What are they doing and why are they doing it? I don't ask why I don't want what they want. I know I don't, and I don't have to ask why. I want to know why they don't want what I want.
What am I looking at when I look at these people? What were they doing last night? Did they have sex? Did they get into a fight with a loved one? Did they have an ordinary good time with friends? What is the next frustration they will encounter and how will they deal with it? What will be their next meaningful joy? How exactly are they moving through this world and this life?
I only see one ordinary moment, a slice, and they all look the same to me. They are all happy and satisfied with their lives. They are just moving from one thing to another thing, and everything is just swell, and if not, they will get through it. I can't imagine any of them having sex. I can't imagine any of them being fiercely and wildly in love. I can't imagine any of them having a major life crisis.
There was that woman on the MRT who was dressed hip, but looked like she had a long night and could have used a few more hours of sleep. Where did she sleep last night?
My classmates are the closest people to me. I see them every weekday for three hours. I'm not here to be social, I'm not here to be social with them. I don't have to put on any act for them. I don't need to try to impress them. They don't need to know me. I'm here to observe, and I'm tracking bits of information I gather about them as time goes on.
They have all come from different places to study here. They all have some story. I have tracked their countries of origin. I've gathered some cities. In my map of the universe, I still don't know where any of them live in Taipei. I don't know what they were doing before they came to class, I don't know where they go after they leave.
2 Japanese women, one from Sapporo, one from Tokyo.
1 Canadian man, father Chinese, mother French.
1 French man. He has studied Chinese before.
1 English man. He is dating a Taiwanese woman.
1 Taiwanese American woman from the Bay Area.
1 Korean woman from Seoul. She is moving this weekend.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. I'm On E (Blondie)
2. In Or Out (live) (Ani DiFranco)
3. We Love Your Apathy (Skunk Anansie)
4. The Fox and Hound (Mary Timony)
5. A Perfect World (Pizzicato Five)
6. This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody) (Talking Heads)
7. I Am One (live) (Smashing Pumpkins)
8. Gatekeeper (Feist)
9. Try to Remember (reprise) ("The Fantasticks")
10. Glory of the 80's (Tori Amos)
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
Keeping track of frustrations.
Last night, my building lost water. These little facts of life always are a cause for stress. Would I need to call the landlady in the morning?, would someone else do it?, what time should I wait for to call? Can't shower, need to use drinking water to brush teeth, can't flush, can't wash hands.
But little frustrations and inconveniences like these can also happen in the monastery. I know for a fact that it happened once at Deer Park when I wasn't there. The difference there is that you have a community to get through it with. Even if it ends up being you who has to fix (or figure out how to fix) the problem, at least you know. You're not an island unto yourself, sitting in your apartment not knowing how the problem will resolve.
This problem took care of itself. Someone else called the landlady, the landlady called in workers to fix the water pump, and she called me before I called her to tell me about the problem and when to expect things back in order.
I was very happy to receive that call. I thought about people in poor communities around the world who will never get that call saying that they will have fresh running water in a few hours. I feel very lucky to have fresh running water.
It's possible to say that those poor communities aren't paying the rent I do to have fresh running water, but why would I make myself unhappy by pointing that out? I'm happy that I have a place to live. I'm happy that it usually has running water, and if it stops working, I'm happy that the problem will get fixed.
There are a lot of things I'm happy about that I think about a lot. I don't like ruining those thoughts by going the extra step to point out why I should be unhappy in spite of them.
I'm not fooling myself that I'm happy. I'm still coming to terms with the unhappiness in my life, or the unhappiness that is my life. But it's good for my mind to remember being happy, and leaving it at that.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Something (demo) (The Beatles)
2. Quinn Beast (Archers of Loaf)
3. Around the Dial (The Kinks)
4. Follow You, Follow Me (live) (Genesis)
5. Clash City Rockers (The Clash)
6. Family Groove (The Neville Brothers)
7. Meditation (Meditacao) (Laurindo Almeida and the Bossa Nova All-Stars - ultralounge)
8. 5:15 The Angels Have Gone (David Bowie)
9. How Long Has This Been Going On? (Lena Horne)
10. Childhood's End? (Marillion)
Last night, my building lost water. These little facts of life always are a cause for stress. Would I need to call the landlady in the morning?, would someone else do it?, what time should I wait for to call? Can't shower, need to use drinking water to brush teeth, can't flush, can't wash hands.
But little frustrations and inconveniences like these can also happen in the monastery. I know for a fact that it happened once at Deer Park when I wasn't there. The difference there is that you have a community to get through it with. Even if it ends up being you who has to fix (or figure out how to fix) the problem, at least you know. You're not an island unto yourself, sitting in your apartment not knowing how the problem will resolve.
This problem took care of itself. Someone else called the landlady, the landlady called in workers to fix the water pump, and she called me before I called her to tell me about the problem and when to expect things back in order.
I was very happy to receive that call. I thought about people in poor communities around the world who will never get that call saying that they will have fresh running water in a few hours. I feel very lucky to have fresh running water.
It's possible to say that those poor communities aren't paying the rent I do to have fresh running water, but why would I make myself unhappy by pointing that out? I'm happy that I have a place to live. I'm happy that it usually has running water, and if it stops working, I'm happy that the problem will get fixed.
There are a lot of things I'm happy about that I think about a lot. I don't like ruining those thoughts by going the extra step to point out why I should be unhappy in spite of them.
I'm not fooling myself that I'm happy. I'm still coming to terms with the unhappiness in my life, or the unhappiness that is my life. But it's good for my mind to remember being happy, and leaving it at that.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Something (demo) (The Beatles)
2. Quinn Beast (Archers of Loaf)
3. Around the Dial (The Kinks)
4. Follow You, Follow Me (live) (Genesis)
5. Clash City Rockers (The Clash)
6. Family Groove (The Neville Brothers)
7. Meditation (Meditacao) (Laurindo Almeida and the Bossa Nova All-Stars - ultralounge)
8. 5:15 The Angels Have Gone (David Bowie)
9. How Long Has This Been Going On? (Lena Horne)
10. Childhood's End? (Marillion)
Sunday, March 05, 2006
Man, the weirdest things happen to me. And the things that happen to me are never quite what I want. I thought that somehow I would continue drumming here in some capacity, but I had no idea how to go about it. I wasn't even sure it was realistic.
So it's just so weird that I ended up today in a drumming group – more like a marching drum corps – in the big park across the street from where I live. All snare drums and a leader on a big bass drum. Definitely not what I would have predicted if someone told me I would continue drumming in Taiwan.
Even weirder, they're the drum "corps" for a political group, and not one I would be affiliated with. Political group supporters go on marches to protest other political groups, and they make a lot of noise while doing it. One way is by having a drum corps.
Oy, what have I gotten myself into.
Anyway, politics are a mess in Taiwan. I won't go into the details, but I align myself with the Democratic Progressive Party (DPP). The DPP was the most successful opposition party to emerge after the ruling Kuomingtang (KMT) party lifted some 40 years of martial law in the late '80s.
There's a lot to not like about the KMT. Especially for "native" Taiwanese, those who were here before the KMT lost the war against Mao Tse-tung and the Communists and invaded Taiwan because they had no where else to go. My family is considered "native" – Chinese who came over from the mainland several centuries ago. The truly native Taiwanese are ethnically Pacific Islanders, not ethnic Chinese.
But for people stridently against the KMT, it would help to recognize that Taiwan as a nation would not exist even as it is without the KMT. Whatever little international standing Taiwan has is thanks to the KMT.
Anyway, this drum corps is affiliated with the "New Party", which I'd never heard of before, but they described themselves as the little brother of the KMT, so I'm thinking they might be some sort of branch reform party.
All I knew is that I want to continue drumming in some capacity, and I was walking through the park and heard these people hitting things with sticks. Next thing I knew, I had a snare drum slung around my waist and having my traditional grip skills put through their paces.
I'm not a traditional grip drummer, but fortunately I had put some time practicing it before I came. I also never learned how to read drum music, so how I ended up working through the patterns on sheet music astounded even me. It actually gave me a lot of confidence. I'm apparently more versatile than I was giving myself credit for!
And strangely, the only drum stuff I was able to bring were sticks and a practice pad, basically all I need to practice this stuff before the protest march on Sunday. Oy, what have I gotten myself into? Like politics anywhere, if you align yourself one way, you're lining yourself up to be hated by someone else. The least you can do for yourself is be hated for something you believe in. I'm only doing it for the drumming.
I can't describe what a twisted kick it was to be marching around a well populated park, practicing these patterns. However, I'm not shy about public performance as long as I'm in a group. And my concentration was focused on the sheet music I was trying to follow, while trying not to knock it off the drum head while playing. I was cross-eyed and dizzy by the end.
Why is my life so fucking weird, and why can't it be fucking weird in a way that I want it to be?
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Sparks of the Tempest (Kansas)
2. Sugar Mice (live) (Marillion)
3. Los Endos (Genesis)
4. Midnight Lullaby (Tom Waits)
5. Nevermind the Enemy (Archers of Loaf)
6. Little Bird/Little Boat (Bill Perkins - ultra lounge)
7. My Girl (The Temptations)
8. Security of the First World (Public Enemy)
9. Droned (Phil Collins)
10. Pale and Precious (Dukes of Stratosphear)
So it's just so weird that I ended up today in a drumming group – more like a marching drum corps – in the big park across the street from where I live. All snare drums and a leader on a big bass drum. Definitely not what I would have predicted if someone told me I would continue drumming in Taiwan.
Even weirder, they're the drum "corps" for a political group, and not one I would be affiliated with. Political group supporters go on marches to protest other political groups, and they make a lot of noise while doing it. One way is by having a drum corps.
Oy, what have I gotten myself into.
Anyway, politics are a mess in Taiwan. I won't go into the details, but I align myself with the Democratic Progressive Party (DPP). The DPP was the most successful opposition party to emerge after the ruling Kuomingtang (KMT) party lifted some 40 years of martial law in the late '80s.
There's a lot to not like about the KMT. Especially for "native" Taiwanese, those who were here before the KMT lost the war against Mao Tse-tung and the Communists and invaded Taiwan because they had no where else to go. My family is considered "native" – Chinese who came over from the mainland several centuries ago. The truly native Taiwanese are ethnically Pacific Islanders, not ethnic Chinese.
But for people stridently against the KMT, it would help to recognize that Taiwan as a nation would not exist even as it is without the KMT. Whatever little international standing Taiwan has is thanks to the KMT.
Anyway, this drum corps is affiliated with the "New Party", which I'd never heard of before, but they described themselves as the little brother of the KMT, so I'm thinking they might be some sort of branch reform party.
All I knew is that I want to continue drumming in some capacity, and I was walking through the park and heard these people hitting things with sticks. Next thing I knew, I had a snare drum slung around my waist and having my traditional grip skills put through their paces.
I'm not a traditional grip drummer, but fortunately I had put some time practicing it before I came. I also never learned how to read drum music, so how I ended up working through the patterns on sheet music astounded even me. It actually gave me a lot of confidence. I'm apparently more versatile than I was giving myself credit for!
And strangely, the only drum stuff I was able to bring were sticks and a practice pad, basically all I need to practice this stuff before the protest march on Sunday. Oy, what have I gotten myself into? Like politics anywhere, if you align yourself one way, you're lining yourself up to be hated by someone else. The least you can do for yourself is be hated for something you believe in. I'm only doing it for the drumming.
I can't describe what a twisted kick it was to be marching around a well populated park, practicing these patterns. However, I'm not shy about public performance as long as I'm in a group. And my concentration was focused on the sheet music I was trying to follow, while trying not to knock it off the drum head while playing. I was cross-eyed and dizzy by the end.
Why is my life so fucking weird, and why can't it be fucking weird in a way that I want it to be?
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Sparks of the Tempest (Kansas)
2. Sugar Mice (live) (Marillion)
3. Los Endos (Genesis)
4. Midnight Lullaby (Tom Waits)
5. Nevermind the Enemy (Archers of Loaf)
6. Little Bird/Little Boat (Bill Perkins - ultra lounge)
7. My Girl (The Temptations)
8. Security of the First World (Public Enemy)
9. Droned (Phil Collins)
10. Pale and Precious (Dukes of Stratosphear)
Saturday, March 04, 2006
My first real weekend here, and despite what I said about needing to change my hours to more normal times, I woke up early this morning to make it to a monastery I visited almost a year ago for their Saturday morning "international group" session. Having already been there last year for a one-day retreat, I had no problem getting there. It was a 30 minute MRT ride to Beitou. From there, I needed to transfer to the Xin Beitou extension, but since it wouldn't come for another 13 minutes, I decided to just walk it.
The session finished at noon, and I had the whole day ahead of me, but since I'll probably go to Xin Beitou regularly on Saturdays, I decided to hold off on exploring that area until later. It was good to make that connection with a monastery, even though I don't care about schools and "masters" or this way to practice or that. Stick with one thing long enough, and it will become dogma.
In fact, I live right next door to a church which I think has Sunday service in English, and I think I'll check that out at some point. Not for the preaching, which I fear will be more of the same old Pauline re-interpretation and bastardization of the Christ message, which I'm sure is good internally, but not so much externally since the rest of us are gonna burn in hell, but just to keep an open channel to the many ways people are trying and striving to make an intangible tangible.
So I took the MRT to Taipei Main Station and spent the rest of the day exploring and shooting. I covered the photography shops at the "Han-Bo" (Hankou-Boai sts.) intersection that a local told me about, walked around the Ximending area, which is Taipei's answer to Japan's youth-oriented Shinjuku, and from there walked to the Longshan Temple area which I was familiar with from last year when I bought a meditation bell for a cousin. I ended the day of walking by taking the MRT to another section of town where my flickr friend gave me a tip about a music store. By then I was pretty tired and not shooting so much, though. I walked home from there, too tired to head out again at night as I'd planned.
Last night I went to the Shilin night market. I wonder how long it would take to hit all the night markets in Taipei.
The session finished at noon, and I had the whole day ahead of me, but since I'll probably go to Xin Beitou regularly on Saturdays, I decided to hold off on exploring that area until later. It was good to make that connection with a monastery, even though I don't care about schools and "masters" or this way to practice or that. Stick with one thing long enough, and it will become dogma.
In fact, I live right next door to a church which I think has Sunday service in English, and I think I'll check that out at some point. Not for the preaching, which I fear will be more of the same old Pauline re-interpretation and bastardization of the Christ message, which I'm sure is good internally, but not so much externally since the rest of us are gonna burn in hell, but just to keep an open channel to the many ways people are trying and striving to make an intangible tangible.
So I took the MRT to Taipei Main Station and spent the rest of the day exploring and shooting. I covered the photography shops at the "Han-Bo" (Hankou-Boai sts.) intersection that a local told me about, walked around the Ximending area, which is Taipei's answer to Japan's youth-oriented Shinjuku, and from there walked to the Longshan Temple area which I was familiar with from last year when I bought a meditation bell for a cousin. I ended the day of walking by taking the MRT to another section of town where my flickr friend gave me a tip about a music store. By then I was pretty tired and not shooting so much, though. I walked home from there, too tired to head out again at night as I'd planned.
Last night I went to the Shilin night market. I wonder how long it would take to hit all the night markets in Taipei.
 |
| 1:01 p.m. - Rooftops from Xinbeitou MRT extension, after morning int'l meditation group session. |
Friday, March 03, 2006
I've been here for a week, and it's been cloudy, spitty, rainy, and dreary the whole time. So much so that I stopped carrying cameras around because everything was starting to look too dreary to shoot. Finally today we got peeks of, well, I wouldn't call it sunshine. I didn't see the sun, but the clouds were thinner and there were probably some breaks that I didn't catch. So I took Bebe with me, and finished the last few frames left on the roll between my apartment and school, about a 15 minute walk.
This afternoon before coming to class, I brought in two rolls to be developed. I had a flickr friend write out a message in Chinese to only process the roll, not cut the negatives, and that I don't want a CD made. Hey, there's a limit to how much Chinese I can learn in three days. So I'll have some fresh shots for Monday.
I need to change my sleeping schedule. In the first few mornings at my apartment, I woke up earlier than I cared to and went out to the park across the street while it was still dark. It was so pleasant that I thought I'd make a habit of getting up early and going to the park. It's not going to happen. Not with 2:10-5:00 P.M. classes. So once morning pronunciation classes end next Tuesday, I'm going to switch my sleeping hours back to normal and spend time in the park in more normal late night hours, which I think should be just as pleasant.
With morning pronunciation class and afternoon class, and the horrible drear that has been the weather, I haven't expanded my radius of exploration, but I think I'll hop on the MRT more this weekend, maybe go to other night markets, maybe scope out other film locations from "Yiyi", since the Lonely Planet guide identifies where the New York Bagel scene was shot.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. How Long (Sweet Honey in the Rock)
2. I Hope That I Don't Fall in Love with You (Tom Waits)
3. Open (Peter Gabriel)
4. Our Love Was (The Who)
5. Disposable Parts (Enon)
6. SheJam (Almost Bootsy Show) (Bootsy Collins)
7. Everything Behind (Julie Plug)
8. Can You Hear Me? (David Bowie)
9. Moss Garden (David Bowie)
10. Double Talk Walk ("City of Angels")
This afternoon before coming to class, I brought in two rolls to be developed. I had a flickr friend write out a message in Chinese to only process the roll, not cut the negatives, and that I don't want a CD made. Hey, there's a limit to how much Chinese I can learn in three days. So I'll have some fresh shots for Monday.
I need to change my sleeping schedule. In the first few mornings at my apartment, I woke up earlier than I cared to and went out to the park across the street while it was still dark. It was so pleasant that I thought I'd make a habit of getting up early and going to the park. It's not going to happen. Not with 2:10-5:00 P.M. classes. So once morning pronunciation classes end next Tuesday, I'm going to switch my sleeping hours back to normal and spend time in the park in more normal late night hours, which I think should be just as pleasant.
With morning pronunciation class and afternoon class, and the horrible drear that has been the weather, I haven't expanded my radius of exploration, but I think I'll hop on the MRT more this weekend, maybe go to other night markets, maybe scope out other film locations from "Yiyi", since the Lonely Planet guide identifies where the New York Bagel scene was shot.
 |
| 1:39 p.m. - default shot |
1. How Long (Sweet Honey in the Rock)
2. I Hope That I Don't Fall in Love with You (Tom Waits)
3. Open (Peter Gabriel)
4. Our Love Was (The Who)
5. Disposable Parts (Enon)
6. SheJam (Almost Bootsy Show) (Bootsy Collins)
7. Everything Behind (Julie Plug)
8. Can You Hear Me? (David Bowie)
9. Moss Garden (David Bowie)
10. Double Talk Walk ("City of Angels")
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
First Day of Class
Now if that heading doesn't bode for a boring post, I don't know what does.
Every day it seems I'm filled to the brim with questions about what I'm doing here, what justifies this existence? I am happy as I can be in the moment to moment, which is pretty happy, feeling liberated as I can even though I know I'm not. The fabric of existence is still torment and filled with unanswerable questions.
Right before I left to come here, I bought the "Scientific American" special edition on time. Only a few good articles. Yes, the nature of time has always confounded me, but it never seemed like something that could be pinned down for investigation. But if not time, then why try to pin down existence? So yes, time is getting added to the pantheon of meditations, starting with "why do we remember the past, but not the future?". Whoa, dude.
I realize what I'm doing now is what I should have been doing seven months ago when I left the monastery, instead of simply writing off that I wouldn't be entering one. This is what I was supposed to be doing, this is what I told the monks I would be doing to see if I really wanted to be a part of the material world or continue on the monastic path.
I know I definitely don't want to be a part of the material world. The headaches and distractions make returning to the monastery appealing again. But if I can maintain this and just live reclusively, that feels most attractive.
First day of classes, I have no desire to meet people or be social or have anything to do with anyone else's life unless there is a fierce resonant connection.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Stop Your Sobbing (live) (The Kinks)
2. The Lowest Part is Free (live) (Archers of Loaf)
3. Life Begins at the Hop (XTC)
4. I Want You (Elvis Costello & the Attractions)
5. Symphony No. 6, I. Allegro ma non troppo (Beethoven)
6. Symphony No. 10, IV. Andante-Allegro (Shostakovich)
7. William's Cut (Kristin Hersh)
8. Peek-A-Boo (Siouxsie & the Banshees)
9. Slip Away (David Bowie)
10. Interlude Libation, the Water Ritual (Bela Fleck & the Flecktones)
Every day it seems I'm filled to the brim with questions about what I'm doing here, what justifies this existence? I am happy as I can be in the moment to moment, which is pretty happy, feeling liberated as I can even though I know I'm not. The fabric of existence is still torment and filled with unanswerable questions.
Right before I left to come here, I bought the "Scientific American" special edition on time. Only a few good articles. Yes, the nature of time has always confounded me, but it never seemed like something that could be pinned down for investigation. But if not time, then why try to pin down existence? So yes, time is getting added to the pantheon of meditations, starting with "why do we remember the past, but not the future?". Whoa, dude.
I realize what I'm doing now is what I should have been doing seven months ago when I left the monastery, instead of simply writing off that I wouldn't be entering one. This is what I was supposed to be doing, this is what I told the monks I would be doing to see if I really wanted to be a part of the material world or continue on the monastic path.
I know I definitely don't want to be a part of the material world. The headaches and distractions make returning to the monastery appealing again. But if I can maintain this and just live reclusively, that feels most attractive.
First day of classes, I have no desire to meet people or be social or have anything to do with anyone else's life unless there is a fierce resonant connection.
iTunes soundtrack:
1. Stop Your Sobbing (live) (The Kinks)
2. The Lowest Part is Free (live) (Archers of Loaf)
3. Life Begins at the Hop (XTC)
4. I Want You (Elvis Costello & the Attractions)
5. Symphony No. 6, I. Allegro ma non troppo (Beethoven)
6. Symphony No. 10, IV. Andante-Allegro (Shostakovich)
7. William's Cut (Kristin Hersh)
8. Peek-A-Boo (Siouxsie & the Banshees)
9. Slip Away (David Bowie)
10. Interlude Libation, the Water Ritual (Bela Fleck & the Flecktones)
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