Continuing with the somber series, but hey, I'm feeling a need to bleed into the web for the duration:

Getting Here from There #2: Friends
When I moved out here, I left friends behind. When I moved out here, I had friends already out here.

The community of friends from Oberlin was a precious one, and one by one, group by group, I managed to alienate them all, *pats self on back*. I don't complain about not having any friends. I know it’s my doing. I got rid of the ones I had, and I keep potential ones at arms length, although not intentionally.

So I don't know how I got here from there, how I became so anti-social, so avoidant of company, unable to fully maintain that I don’t need it. I used to be able to make and maintain friends, so it's not about ability. Maybe I don't get out enough. Maybe there isn't a large enough pool to find people I can relate to, who have had similar experience and problems as I've had, who don't get scared away by what comes out of my mouth and what is on my arms and legs. My guess now is that I simply don't want them.