testing photoblog. testing testing. can you hear me now?
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(formerly 'temporary solution for a permanent problem')
about me:
This weblog is not being written to be read. It charts a mental decline and a relentless, often distracted, crawl towards an inevitable suicide, with sophomoric ruminations on religion from a Buddhist biased point of view, some armchair cosmology and astrophysics, monastic aspirations, unexceptional photography and other really, really, REALLY DEEP THOUGHTS that contradict themselves and aren't supposed to be watertight. Get off my back.
"With mind distracted, never thinking, 'Death is coming,'
To slave away on the pointless business of mundane life,
And then to come out empty - it is a tragic error.
Recognition of necessity is the holy teaching
So won't you live this divine truth from now on?"
These are the words of the great adepts.
If you don't put the Mentor's precept in your mind,
Won't you be the one who deceives yourself? - Bardo Thödol (root verses).
Tibetan Book of the Dead documentary
"With mind distracted, never thinking, 'Death is coming,'
To slave away on the pointless business of mundane life,
And then to come out empty - it is a tragic error.
Recognition of necessity is the holy teaching
So won't you live this divine truth from now on?"
These are the words of the great adepts.
If you don't put the Mentor's precept in your mind,
Won't you be the one who deceives yourself? - Bardo Thödol (root verses).
Tibetan Book of the Dead documentary
We are not human beings on a spiritual journey, we are spiritual beings on a human journey - Native American saying various attribution
other web presences
Blog Archive
-
▼
2004
(185)
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▼
May
(26)
- I have no answers. I'm getting no inspiration. B...
- Hm. Well, today's the day I decide what I'll be d...
- I dislike the paradigm implied in the phrase "taki...
- INSTRUCTIONS FOR JURORS SERVING THE WEEK OF JUNE 0...
- All the signs are neutral. It's just that I inter...
- Matters of great importance. Perfect soundtracks ...
- The key to failing to commit suicide is having a p...
- Suicide is not for everyone, and I certainly don't...
- It occurs to me that people who know me might reco...
- testing photoblog. testing testing. can you hear m...
- I'm so pathetic. I'm the laughing stock of the su...
- Next comes the Valley of Bewilderment,a place of p...
- Nothing new. Tracking high tides. Why are places...
- I did my ghost thing around the Castro this aftern...
- Suicide: The Metaphor, part 2:And then you find th...
- Suicide: The Metaphor I grew up on cliffs. The Pa...
- If I move to a city where no one knows me, I'm goi...
- It's really such a mess. I think of where I am an...
- I know exactly how a ship without a rudder or an a...
- Identity Inventory - I was born in a crossfire hur...
- Connect.
- I take it back what I said in the previous entry. ...
- Egad, I wish I would stop writing entries like the...
- I go through days as a ghost. When I'm home, no o...
- I'm not crazy. I have no problem distinguishing r...
- I'm trying to wrestle back control of this weblog....
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▼
May
(26)
other links:
Labels
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- consciousness time (25)
- cosmology astronomy physics universe (42)
- Craigs List suicide note (31)
- cutting (18)
- cycling running (170)
- death (140)
- Deer Park (24)
- Delphine (9)
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- enlightenment (30)
- existential angst (98)
- family (165)
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- insomnia (94)
- isolation emptiness angst (102)
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- karma (78)
- lists quizzes forwards memes (52)
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- lyric quotes (125)
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- making music (60)
- meditation(s) visualization (114)
- memory lane (107)
- mental health medical (153)
- metaphor (54)
- mindfulness practice (136)
- mix CD (42)
- monastery (100)
- negativity (114)
- neurotic dysfunction (126)
- New Jersey days (66)
- Northern Exposure quote (36)
- observation perspective (99)
- paradigms personal theory (227)
- personal relations (158)
- personality insight (136)
- personality psychology identity (75)
- photography (397)
- politics race humanity (82)
- product review (11)
- quantum meta physics (41)
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- reads (58)
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- rotten tomatoes (83)
- Sadie (28)
- San Francisco days (107)
- self-destruction (38)
- self-portrait (43)
- Shiho (7)
- sleep paralysis (4)
- suicide (311)
- surrealitivity (115)
- Taipei daily life (307)
- the big joke (39)
- the life cycle (42)
- the path (75)
- the story so far (24)
- Tibet (12)
- Tibetan Book of the Dead (61)
- travelogue (28)
- video (49)
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- Zohar (7)
full list of mix CDs of every year of my life, imbued with blessings
- 1969
- 1970
- 1971
- 1972
- 1973
- 1974
- 1975
- 1976
- 1977
- 1978
- 1979
- 1980
- 1981
- 1982
- 1983
- 1984
- 1985
- 1986
- 1987
- 1988
- 1989
- 1990
- 1991
- 1992
- 1993
- 1994
- 1995
- 1996
- 1997
- 1998
- 1999
- 2000
- 2001
- 2002
- 2003
- 2004
- 2005
- 2006
- 2007
- 2008
- 2009
- 2010
- 2011
- 2012, part one
- 2012, part two
- 2013, part one
- 2013, part two
- 2014, part one
- 2014, part two
- 2015, part one
- 2015, part two
- 2016, part one
- 2016, part two
- 2017 part one
- 2017 part two
- 2018 part 1
- 2018 part 2
- 2019 part 1
- 2019 part 2
- 2020 part 1
- 2020/21 part 2
Desert Island Discs
- Kansas - Two For the Show
- Genesis - The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway
- Tom Waits - Frank's Wild Years
- Ringo Shiina - Karuki Zamen Kuri No Hana
- Tizzy Bac - 我想你会变成这样都是我害的
- Throwing Muses - Limbo
- Versus - Two Cents Plus Tax
- Modest Mouse - The Lonesome Crowded West
- Marillion - Clutching At Straws
- Southern All-Stars - Umino Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!
reading list
- Confusion Arises as Wisdom - Ringu Tulku
- Dakini's Warm Breath - Judith Simmer-Brown
- Secret of the Vajra World - Reginald Ray
- The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying - Sogyal Rinpoche
- The Essential Zohar: The Source of Kabbalistic Wisdom - Rav P.S. Berg
- The Little Prince - Antoine de Saint-Exupery
- Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind - Shunryu Suzuki
- Mountain Record of Zen Talks - John Daido Loori
- Illusions - Richard Bach
- The Conference of the Birds - Farid ud-Din Attar
- Heart Wood from the Bodhi Tree - Buddhadasa Bhikkhu
- The Character of Rain (The Metaphysics of Tubes) - Amelie Nothomb
