An Old Chestnut (with a few updates):

A Guide to Political Ideologies

FEUDALISM
You have 2 cows. Your Lord takes some of the milk.

FASCISM
You have 2 cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows. Your neighbors help take care of them and you all share the milk.

APPLIED COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows. You have to take care of them but the government takes all the milk.

DICTATORSHIP
You have 2 cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

MILITARISM
You have 2 cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

TOTALITARIANISM
You have 2 cows. The government takes both and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.

PURE DEMOCRACY
You have 2 cows. You and your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY
You have 2 cows. You and your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

NIGERIAN DEMOCRACY
You have 2 cows. The government takes both, shoots you and sends the cows to Zurich.

AMERICAN DEMOCRACY
The government promises to give you 2 cows if you vote for them. After the election the President is impeached for speculating in Cow futures. The Press dubs the affair “Cowgate”. The cows sue you for breach of contract.

BRITISH DEMOCRATIC SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows. You feed them sheep’s brains and they go mad. The government doesn’t do anything.

EUROPEAN DEMOCRACY
You have 2 cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. After that it takes both, shoots one and milks the other, pouring the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms regarding the missing cows.

SINGAPOREAN DEMOCRACY
You have 2 cows. The government fines you for keeping 2 unlicensed farm animals.

MALAYSIAN DEMOCRACY
You have two cows. The government confiscates your cows, gives you a donkey and takes you for a ride.

CAPITALISM
You have 2 cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

HONG KONG CAPITALISM
You have 2 cows. You sell 3 of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all 4 cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping 5 cows. The milk rights of 6 cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company, secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the milk rights to all 7 cows back to the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns 8 cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the 2 cows because of bad Feng-Shui.